Gaslighting in the workplace happens more frequently than you may realise.
In fact…
It frequently accompanies some of the worst misconduct in the workplace — like unwelcome sexual advances at work. If a victim decides to speak up about it, a gaslighter’s first instinct is to make that victim question their own memory of events.
Sound familiar?
Let’s dive into why you should treat workplace gaslighting like the harassment that it is.
Here’s What You’ll Learn:
- What Is Gaslighting at Work?
- How Gaslighting Harassment Connects to Sexual Harassment
- 6 Warning Signs of Workplace Gaslighting
- The Psychological Impact Gaslighting Has on Victims
- How to Respond if You Are Being Gaslighted
What Is Gaslighting at Work?
Gaslighting is a form of emotional abuse in which a person manipulates someone else into questioning their memory, perception, or judgement.
It takes its name from Gaslight, a 1944 film about a man who emotionally abuses his wife until she questions her own sanity.
It’s exactly what happens when someone gaslights you at work.
A gaslighter will:
- Claim that certain events never occurred
- Retroactively distort the facts of a situation
- Brush off concerns as “nothing”
- Blame the victim for how they feel
- Attempt to turn coworkers and management against the victim
It’s manipulative. It’s intentional. It’s designed to make the victim feel confused and powerless.
Unsettling? That’s because it is.
Gaslighting rarely happens all at once. It’s a slow, steady process that wears down a victim until they question themselves. It’s why so many victims don’t even recognise it’s happening until it’s too late.
How Gaslighting Harassment Connects to Sexual Harassment
This is where things get dark.
Sexual harassment victims are often gaslit to discourage them from reporting workplace harassment. If someone attempts to harass a colleague — or if a company tries to cover it up — the typical response is to gaslight the victim by denying that it happened, downplaying the situation, or reframing it altogether.
This goes beyond manipulative. It’s harassment in and of itself.
Consulting a sexual harassment lawyer in Los Angeles is critically important if there is suspicion of being gaslit after reporting sexual harassment at work. Experienced attorneys understand that both phenomena frequently happen in tandem, and they can help victims understand their rights as employees under the law.
Did you know that 1 in 3 women will experience some form of sexual harassment while on the job? Despite that staggering statistic, only 19% of women file a formal report. Gaslighting makes victims believe that no one will listen to them or take them seriously.
That’s understandable. Because it’s exactly what the gaslighter wants.
6 Warning Signs of Workplace Gaslighting
Gaslighting can be difficult to spot. Gaslighters bank on their victims not recognising the manipulation for what it is.
But there are common patterns to look out for.
If any of these occur in the workplace, take note:
- Someone tells you “that never happened” after you witnessed or experienced something clearly against company policy
- Someone twists your words or the documented details of an event in conversation after the fact
- Someone calls you “too sensitive” or accuses you of overreacting after you bring up a legitimate concern
- Coworkers and managers suddenly avoid you or appear to turn against you
- You walk away from an interaction feeling confused, anxious, or “off”
- A boss takes credit for your work, and then denies it when the timeline is raised
- Someone gives unclear instructions, then punishes you when you ask questions
Gaslighting often happens in clusters. Seeing one of these red flags occur by itself might be a false alarm. Seeing multiple is a stronger signal.
Did you know that 44% of employees face harassment at work every year? Only 41% of sexual harassment incidents are reported to management.
That doesn’t mean those other 59% didn’t happen. But for a lot of victims, gaslighting can make them feel uncomfortable reporting it.
Isolated incidents can often be easily explained away. If there is a pattern of abusive behaviour like this, it’s time to address the problem. It’s against the law, and every employee has the right to speak up.
The Psychological Impact Gaslighting Has on Victims
Gaslighting doesn’t just affect victims at work. It follows them everywhere they go.
They experience higher rates of anxiety, depression, and overall emotional fatigue. They constantly second-guess themselves, and many start to shy away from normal situations they otherwise would never have thought twice about. Here are some common signs gaslighting can affect a person:
- Withdrawing from normal workplace activities
- Poor job performance despite being able to do the job well
- Fear of speaking up in the workplace
- Second-guessing memory and thought processes
Over time, it only gets worse. Victims of gaslighting will often begin to believe the gaslighter’s narrative and think that they are the problem. This mental shift is intentional, and it’s what differentiates gaslighting from other forms of workplace conflict.
50% of women and 1 in 6 men say they have experienced sexual harassment at work. Consider how many of those victims were gaslit afterwards for trying to speak up.
Add gaslighting on top of harassment, and the victim suffers twice as much damage.
How to Respond if You Are Being Gaslighted
Here is where the theory ends and the action steps begin.
If workplace gaslighting is suspected, try this:
- Document everything. Note dates, times, specific wording, and witnesses present. Forward relevant emails immediately.
- Look for patterns. A single incident can sometimes be innocent. A pattern of behaviour is not.
- Talk to someone you trust. A coworker, mentor, or HR representative can be a great ally — if it feels safe to confide in them.
- Remember the legal protections in place. Gaslighting in tandem with sexual misconduct, discrimination, and other forms of harassment is illegal.
- Seek legal counsel. An employment lawyer will be able to determine if the behaviour experienced crosses a legal threshold.
68% of workplace harassment goes unreported every year. Gaslighting is a huge contributor to that number.
Victims stay silent because they were made to feel like they would never be believed if they spoke up. And that is exactly what the gaslighter wants them to think.
Conclusion
Gaslighting at work is serious. No employer — or anyone else — should be able to make a victim feel otherwise.
It’s abusive. It’s used to cover up some of the worst harassment in the workplace. And most importantly, it can be stopped.
Let’s review:
- Gaslighting manipulates victims to question their memory, perception, and judgement
- Gaslighting is frequently used to prevent victims from reporting sexual harassment
- Gaslighting causes serious psychological distress, and that damage accelerates the longer it goes unchecked
- Federal law protects employees from gaslighting whenever it occurs alongside harassment and discrimination
- Documentation and legal consultation are the most important steps if gaslighting is suspected
No one should have to question their reality at work. Understanding that gaslighting is harassment — and knowing how to spot it — can make all the difference.